Things can change so fast...

The beginning of last week started great, I was excited for the kids to start school, I was enjoying the last days of summer, and looking forward to a few last getaways before school started.

I have had pain in my abdomen so I figured since I had two sisters that had already had their gallbladders out, this must be my problem too. I went to my Dr. on Thurs. and had an ultrasound set up for Mon. I went in expecting them to tell me it was time to get my gallbladder out once and for all. Simple. little. procedure. I'm always uneasy when the tech leaves for another opinion. This time though, I was certain it wasn't going to be good news like it was before when the ultrasound tech found twins. He told me they don't think it's my gallbladder at all and that there are spots on my liver.

The next day I went in for a CT scan with the reactive dye. Still thinking it could be something simple, I wasn't too worried. Then on Wed. my doctor wanted to see me and my husband. Now I was worried. He told me that I have a growth on my pancreas and multiple lesions on my liver. All of my liver tests, blood tests, and white blood cell tests came back normal. I was terrified to say the least and jokingly asked for a tranquilizer.

On Thurs. I met with an Oncologist. That's a fun word, oncologist. We all know what that means. They think I may have cancer. That is another fun word. c.a.n.c.e.r. He filled me with terror as we asked what the worst vs. best prognosis could be. I have a 7 cm. tumor on my pancreas and multiple lesions on my liver. I'm still hoping it's just some weird (but friendly and benign) anomaly hanging out by my pancreas but I'm filled with fear as I think of my young children.

So Friday I went in for a liver biopsy. Biopsy. That is another fun word. I was so terrified the whole day but was so blessed to be able to spend the weekend with my family. They gave me great comfort. We even went to Lagoon on Sat. (I will post pictures later) and that was fun and hard at the same time. It was fun to see my kids laugh and be with my family.

Today, I went and got a PET scan. They scan more of your body to see if they can find anymore "spots" anywhere else in my body. I have never felt so alone. Jason couldn't be with me and I had to wait for an hour for the dye to circulate, alone. Well, so far the doctors have been less than compassionate and have not given me any results yet. We wait and wonder and worry. I will post more when I find out more, I just wanted to let people know the facts as we have them.

Today I was able to see my two kindergartner's and one first grader off to school. I wouldn't miss it for the world. (more posts on that too) It really makes you realize what is important in life. I just want to be around to raise my children. I hope I am granted that blessing. I am grateful for the blessings, prayers, thoughts, fasting, help with kids, cards, flowers, dinner and other help that has been given to me and my family. I feel so loved and am so grateful to all of you through this incredibly hard time. So, I'll hang in there and update you more. Hug your kids, be grateful for your husbands, and cherish the simple moments in life that we too often take for granted. Things can change so fast.